whipping fete...

it was dawn...
the sun had just begun to rise...as the town of badjoude appeared before our eyes, people slowly trickled out of their homes and joined us at what during the day was the market...they too came to see the fight...not knowing what to expect but having had visions about it since it was first told to me, i stood there on the road waiting with great anticipation...this would be my first time witnessing such a spectacle...in the distance whistles were blown along with faint chanting...they were on their way...it seemed that they were coming from all directions...i looked down the main road but saw nothing...as the chanting and whistling got louder a different set of whistles from another direction began also followed by chanting...i kept looking in all directions trying to find the source of all this noise but nothing...just as i gave up and started walking back to the crowd something caught my eye...over the hill you could see whips suspended in the air marching towards us in unison...
the walking whips seemed to deceive us but only for a short time soon we could see that they were attached to the men who continued to march towards us...the chanting grew much louder once they came over the hill...at the same time another group of men and whips were coming from the other direction blowing whistles and chanting a different song in unison...as the men of both groups got closer i noticed something that didn't fit: some of the men were wearing woman's clothing...shirts, tight tank tops even bras that were stuffed to look like real breast...some even wore wigs and lipstick...it was a bit bizarre since there are strict gender roles and rules here: men would never do woman's work yet on this day they dress as the opposite sex...
other men were dressed in a woven cloth wrapped around their waists and usually a matching one around their heads...others were dressed in leather skirts covering their lower half with strips of leather hanging down and a string of peanuts or other things criss-crossed across their chest and back and a feathered headdress to top it off...
other older men would be carrying around several whips like a caddy carries golf clubs for a golfer... some even attached little stuffed animals to their shirts or headdress...finally as both crowds neared us they started to dance, stomp and chant in place to taunt each other...this lasted for sometime until someone jumped over to the grass area and then the two groups followed...even quicker the crowd ran to follow and i stood there for a split second wondering what to do... i decided to run right after everyone as well...the whipping started at once, disorganized and out of nowhere...men were whipping each other then would throw their arms up in the air in triumph as other men usually older would run over to cheer him on...it was complete chaos...there were men running around with animal bones pretending they were cell phones, using them to make phone calls or others had video cameras and were filming the crowd pretending to take photos of us...every once in a while a whip would come flying in my direction but i was too busy watching and taking pictures to the whipping to notice that i was getting hit...soon enough the chaos turned into organized one-on-one whipping combat...each man received three chances to whip their opponent...once he had his three they would switch and the other guy had his chance to whip three times...on the third hit the "caddies" would jump in to make sure nothing further was done and the fight was over...from another part of the field people would start pushing to clear the area...the two fighters would be the only ones left in the center...a new fight would begin...this would happen many times you never knew when or where a fight would start...sometimes i was caught right next to a fighter...i took those opportunities to take great photos but almost got crushed with a whip at the same time...at one point a friend and i held hands trying to get out of the center of one fight only to end up in the center of another...the adrenaline rush was awesome; nowhere was i going to have the chance to see something like this...our group got separated throughout the fighting and it wasn't until a few hours later when we returned to kate's house did we finally see each other again...

the twins...

latifatou, moises, shabi and i were sitting on my porch in the middle of a conversation when agnes, the pharmacist, ran over to my house with a flat, metal container in her hand...a woman next door to agnes was in labor and ready to give birth as we spoke...since moises arrived on his moto latifa grabbed his keys without asking as i grabbed my helmet...as i jumped on the moto that latifa has already started up, agnes handed me the metal container...suddenly we were off to find the woman...by the time we arrived she had already given birth right in the grass to twins: a boy and a girl...they were so small and barely moving...i opened the container to find gloves, scissors, and 2 small clamps...latifa put on the gloves before tying off and cutting the ambilical cords...as she was doing this, she yelled for some cloth and a basin...an older woman handed me the cloths which i quickly arranged them for wrapping up the kids to take to the health center...once the babies were wrapped, we placed them in the basin...latifa then assisted the mother with the afterbirth and afterwards wrapped the mother up to soak up the blood and extra fluids...as she was working on mom, i grabbed the basin with the twins and took them over to the moto...latifa instructed the mom to stay put and bring the kids to the center...she jumped on the moto and signaled for me to get on...my instincts were immediately in gear, i put on my helmet, picked up the basin and hopped on without thinking twice...it wasn't until we started moving that i suddenly realized that i was carrying two newborns in a basin on a motocycle...'don't you dare drop them' played in my mind like a broken record as we rode over rocks, bumps and other challenges to getting these babies to the health center safely...the faster latifa went, the harder i held on to the basin until we reached the center...

i hopped off just as fast as i hopped on and ran into the delivery room with the basin where francoise, the matron (midwife's assistant) was waiting...as soon as i got off, latifa had taken off for the mother...carefully francoise grabbed the babies from the basin, placed them on a bed and began to clean them off, weight, measure and clothe them...in the meantime, latifa arrived with the mother and placed her on the delivery table to make sure the placenta had been completely removed...when a woman gives birth at the hospital they are supposed to bring extra rags, soap, petroleum jelly and clothes for the baby...the father was somewhat paralyzed from the waist down and used a hand-pedal wheelchair to get around or placed flip-flops on his hands and dragged his feet along behind him for shorter distances...the mother was also partly paralyzed except it was her leg and arm on the left side...i have no idea what the father does but mom is a seller at the market...they also have 2 other girls: 3 and 6 years old...the family was so poor that all they had were rags...there was nothing to clothe the children in...

harmattam had just started so the temperature was starting to cool down...the babies needed to be properly dressed so i asked if we could all chip in money and buy the children some clothes...agnes who had been waiting for us at the health center collected money and went a few villages over to buy baby clothes...while agnes was gone, mother and twins were placed in the hopital section where they would stay for a few days before returning home...a few hours later agnes returned with the clothes for the twins...the mother was very touched and grateful that she kept thanking us over and over...

the following wednesday the mother had brought the twins for vaccinations...she was having a hard time breastfeeding them which we were very concerned about...we kept encouraging her to keep trying...i also made it a point to visit the family once a week, just to see how the family was doing and to monitor the progress of the twins...around the end of october i made my third visit to their home...'good afternoon'...'how are you?' 'and your husband?' 'and your girls?' 'and the twins?'...'the girl died'...'WHAT!'...'yeah, she died last week'...'of what'...'oh, we don't know she just died.'...and like that life goes on...i was astonished at their casualness when they said she died...it was as if that happens every day like brushing your teeth...or eating...something you don't think twice about...ironically, here in africa children die all the time for no reason at all...out of every 5 babies born today 1 will never reach its 5th birthday...out of every 1,000 live births, 32 children will die at birth, 35 will die within the first 2 months, 129 will die between 1 and 5 years old...so the death of the twin girl was no surprise to anyone, except to me...

surviving...

i am surviving my first month without electricity or running water...that was a lot hard at first than i had original imagined...living without those things takes getting used to...for the first couple of weeks i would get up and try to find something only to realize that i can't see a thing cause i left the lantern in the other room...when there's no electricity, you gotta remember to carry your lantern with you everywhere you go...you also get a sense of how dark night really is...its not like back home where because of all the lights, its not very dark...you cannot possibly imagine what darkness is really like...it is truly an amazing thing to experience...having no running water was also strange at first...i've taken what we call the "bucket bath" before but it was another things entirely to know this would be my everyday routine to wash myself (sometimes 3 times a day)...for those of you who have never had the pleasure of taking one, a bucket bath is where you fill a bucket with water, grab a cup, and proceed to wash yourself...it takes some getting used to...the first few times i took my nightly bucket bath my eyes would wonder around my cement shower and begin to comprehend the choice i have made to do peace corps again this time in africa...

the one thing i can say that my house wasn't lacking were cockroaches, spiders, scorpions, rats, lizards and mice...and they all happily lived with me in the space between my ceiling and the roof...the day that i arrived in my village i didn't even think about the fact that i had no electricity or running water or furniture...we had been driving since 6am and we arrived at 10pm that night...i just placed my mattress on the floor of my living room, rigged my mosquito net around the mattress by attaching it on one side to a chair, on the other to my bike...

i didn't even shower (well i didn't have any water to take a shower with)...i just crawled under my mosquito net and went to sleep...in actuality i couldn't sleep due in part to the roaches "flying" around my living room...they usually only frequent my latrine but at night they get adventurous...(a side note but relevant to my first night: roaches are loud walkers and flyers...no matter where they were i could always hear them...one night while i was sleeping a roach ran across my bed near my head...i woke up irritated and disgusted remembering where they live but the funny thing is what woke me up was the pounding of his feet as he made the mad dash across my bed)...so all night i kept hearing them (another side note: i utterly hate and am disgusted by roaches...the first few nights i could not use my latrine cause they had taken it over at night...hundreds of roaches would be climbing out of the hole and up the walls...OK maybe not hundreds but enough to freak me out...the first night my counterpart had to spray my latrine cause i couldn't even suck it and do it myself...HA!)...
what kept me up most nights was the "rat race" literally going on above my ceiling...of course they always chose to make the most noise while i was trying to sleep...along with the rat race in the ceiling, the rats had invaded another part of my house: the kitchen...it was bad enough that i had been living on the floor but to have giants rats (and i mean bigger than new york city rats - as big and long as you forearm big) making a mess of my kitchen...one night i woke up to dishes, pots and pans falling onto the floor...the noise was incredibly loud that i thought someone had broken into my kitchen (to enter my kitchen i have to exit my house into a small patio and enter my kitchen through another door)...my first instinct was to grab the heaviest thing i could, something that could do the most damage...i didn't have much so i grabbed my bike pump, walked quietly to my side door and waited...i listened very attentively to figure out where they were...they wouldn't be ale to get into my house unless they broke through my door which was highly unlikely...so there i was waiting...when i didn't hear anything for a long time i assumed the intruder had left so i opened the door ready for him anyway...no one was there and the kitchen door was closed too...interesting that is a very courteous intruder to rummage through my kitchen only to close the door and close the latch on his way out...when i reached for the kitchen door i heard a noise inside...now it was not possible that a person was inside and the kitchen door was locked from the outside...it has to be an animal...but what animal and how?...well only one way to find out...i opened the door and what did i find...a huge, huge rat the size of my arm that had knocked over all my things

(since i had no furniture and everything was close to the floor within reach)...when i shone the flashlight on him he squeaked, I screamed he ran, i ran...he ran across the patio and exited through my drainage hole, thereby showing me how he entered...from time to time the rats would come into my kitchen and chew up everything until i finally got smart and covered my drainage hole with a screen...now they don't come visit anymore...but there were still some other undesired visitors coming in the middle of the night...

one night around the first week in my new house i had opened the door to my kitchen and noticed something running out of the kitchen as i was walking in...at first i thought it was a small rat or mouse...i grabbed my little broom determined to kill whatever it was...when i saw it i began to hit it nonstop...after the first hit he turned around...but that didn't look like a mouse?...what in the hell is that?...i kept hitting it until i was sure it was dead...i got closer to examine it but it didn't look like an animal, more like a bug...i had my suspicions on what it was but i wanted confirmation before i uttered a word...i called over the girl next door...when she arrived she gasped..."what?" "its a scorpion"..."a scorpion?"..."yes"...oh jeez...i had never seen one before in my life...i've seen one on television but nothing compares to seeing it in person...they are truly the ugliest, scariest, and most threatening-looking things on the planet...she proceeds to tell me that if you get stung by one it hurts like hell and some people die...seriously now?!?!?!...now i was scared...i don't want to die at least not at the hands (or stinger) of that ugly thing...man after that i was really paranoid so i would scan everything before moving forward...another night i was in my bedroom about to walk through my doorway when i saw a scorpion walking above my door back up the wall and disappear under the ceiling(note: my ceiling is not well done. there are gaps between the the wall so things can crawl through like SCORPIONS)...he was gone but i was still very unhappy to have an unwanted guest in my house...i sprayed my ceiling with insecticide like everyone had told me and before i walked out of my door something had fallen from the ceiling...i point my flashlight in the direction of the noise but i didn't see anything so i moved in closer...there on the ground was a scorpion facing the wall with his stinger up...i panicked and tried to calm myself...i have to kill it...there is no one here to help so i grabbed what i now call my scorpion stompers and got ready...i moved some things out of the way and poked the scorpion to get him moving...he moved, i screamed but not enough for me to get a clear shot...i took a deep breath and convinced myself that i'm way bigger than this guy...what can he do to me...i poked him again and this time ran straight for me which gave me a clear shot and it was over...he was dead...after killing him i ran over to latifa's house and told her how i'm a bit scared to go to sleep...i couldn't believe how scared i was over something so small but as everyone keeps telling me they are dangerous...latifa and her fiance walked back with me to my house to help me inspect it...i was sure that the scorpion in my bedroom that got away was still there...shabi, her fiance, starts inspecting around while i go out to my patio for something...just then latifa screams, shabi grabs a shoe and i'm left wondering what is going on as i stared at both of them from the other side of the doorway...BAM...thump...another scorpion dead...so i'm not the only one afraid of these guys...so i ask them the same question i had been obsessed with: can a scorpion kill a person...shabi and latifa both answered yes but only if sorcery is attached...HUH!?!?!?... scorpions and sorcery...explain...well here in africa there are people who practice sorcery...there are two kinds: good and evil (of course)...good sorcery is a socially acceptable practice...many people take their sick to a sorcerer to cure them...however there is also sorcery that some practice to kill people...a person may try to kill you by placing "gris gris" on a scorpion and have that scorpion sting you...with sorcery attached, you will die...this is what latifa explains to me...excuse me but are you telling me that the only way i will die from a scorpion is if someone has put a spell on the scorpion?...yes, she said...do you believe in this, i asked..."oh yes it exists", she said...from that moment on i started to lose my fear in scorpions...

lizards are probably the only thing that didn't bother me much except when they ran around in my ceiling...like the rats in my ceiling they always seem to be having their own races...because of them i've started to wear earplugs...some times i have resorted to hitting the ceiling to get them to stop: some times that works; other times not really...one morning i woke up to something jumping around in my bedroom...i didn't have my glasses on so i couldn't tell what it was...plus the mosquito net made it even harder...i quickly put on my glasses and slowly crawled out from under my mosquito net...hanging upside down from a gap in my ceiling was a rather large lizard...he wasn't moving - i assumed he was dead so i decided to take care of the thing that was making all this noise first...as i walked closer to this thing, it jumped up from behind my suitcase, grabbing on to the wall before falling again...i finally caught a glimpse and saw that it too was a large lizard...i ran to my livingroom and grabbed my broom using that to guide (more like push) him out of my house...so i came back for the other guy...he was still hanging motionless upside...i poked him thinking he was dead...he fell onto the floor and started running around, jumping up trying to crawl back up the wall...it was comical to watch...for a minute or two i watched him try in vain to jump up onto the wall only to land flat on his face...when i realized that he wasn't going to run for it, i pushed him around with my broom until he reached freedom...

this is my new life...a very different life...welcome to africa!

why did i do peace corps again?...

i asked myself that a million times during that 9 weeks of training i had to endure all over again...while still in ukraine i had my reasons for doing another tour: gain more public health experience, live and work in africa (my original preference when i applied for peace corps) finally learn french, mostly to have a chance to do public health before committing myself to a masters in public health program...they were all good reasons for me and all would help me acheive my goal of working in public health in africa...but as i sat through training again i wondered if that was enough...don't get me wrong that staff was extremely kind and helpful, i learned a great deal about health issues the african continent faces but i just wanted to move to my village and get to work...

part of my frustration came from having already done peace corps...when i arrived at staging in philadelphia i barely spoke to anyone...i had just come off one of the greatest experience in my life...to a certain extent this time around i knew what to expect which made it even more frustrating...since i had done it before i was in a very differnt place than my entire group....what also made things worse was the fact that I was going through reverse culture shock (having been out of ukraine for so long) and culture shock (adjusting to beninese culture) at the same time...and then of course the nature of training itself...to lose my ndependence (in so many ways) again was hard enough the first time but having to lose it a second time - you have no idea...i thought training would never end...

when it seemed like I couldn't take it anymore we were finally sworn in as the 21st PSL group and at the same time celebrated 40 years of pc benin...so was it all worth it? i don't know yet...ask me that again in a few months...maybe i'll have an answer for you then...

another child lost of africa...

i witnessed my first birth and death of a child...it happened fast and without warning...i had barely spent a day visiting my new post when i encountered my frst pre-natal consultation with a young woman from the village...not that long before i was showing a peace corps volunteer from a nearby village my house which is located directly across the street from the health center...we were walking back to the maternity ward when my counterpart, latifatou (the nurse/mid-wife), called me over from the consultation room...lying on the table was a very small young woman with a very large round belly while latifa was listening to the woman's stomach with an old style stethoscope...i waited patiently as latifa checked her vitals...although they were speaking in lokpa, the local language, the woman could barely speak when answering questions...she was having respiratory problems and abdominal pain...latifa turned to me and told me the baby was breeched (baby was feet first)...she also informed me that the pregnant woman had visited a "charlatan" (witch doctor)...she had been married for 3 years and was unable to conceive...in hopes of conceiving she visited the witch doctor who gave her a special cream to rub over her chest and back...what was in the cream we do not know...he even told her that he would deliver the baby and not to give birth at the maternity ward...eventually she conceived this child but with the breeched situation there was no way she could give birth in the village...in order to give birth at the maternity ward, the baby's head must come out first...if not village health centers don't have the facilities to operate...since our maternity cannot do operations latifa referred the young lady to the hospital in Djougou ( the closest city which is 46 kilometers away)...she must have a c-section or the baby and the mother could die...latifa signed the referral form and as we were walking outside the young woman's father-in-law arrived...latifa explained the situation to him and the urgency of leaving right now...i realized that the abdominal pain she was having was actually labor pains and that she could give birth at any time...for a while they did nothing, just sat around waiting...waiting for what?...i didn't know...about 30 minutes went by and finally a zemidjan arrived... they put the young woman on the zem and all i kept thinking was with all the bumps that woman's going give birth on the road...

little did i know that about 30 minutes after they drove off another zem returned with the baby...she gave birth on the road just outside of the village...that woman never had a chance...they placed the kid on the table and i walked in about 5 minutes later...as i walked through the door i stopped short...i had never in my life seen a newborn baby minutes after birth but this baby i later realized was not your typical looking baby...he had a deformed head: instead of being round it was elongated...he had 6 perfectly formed fingers on each hand, his chest was super small while his stomach was twice the size of his entire body, he also had teeth formed just right under his gums (you could see the whiteness showing through)...he was barely breathing taking a breath every 30-40 seconds...it was painful to watch...he died there right on the table within a few minutes... the young woman who had just given birth returned on another zem...i moved away from the door where i had been standing...as the mother walked in she looked over at her dead baby, climbed on the delivery table, and said nothing...she delivered the afterbirth (placenta), wrapped herself up in sarong and walked to the hospital room...not once shedding a tear for her dead baby boy...immediately i walked outside, around the back of the maternity ward and started crying...i was crying for the baby who just died, crying for the woman who just lost her first baby, crying for the countless babies that die here in africa everyday, and i was crying for myself having witnessed death with my own eyes...

shaken from the day before i wondered what my second day at my post would be like…i was laying in bed slowly waking up when latifa called for me to come to the maternity…i got dressed and walked out the door…i entered the delivery room to find a woman lying on the delivery table with latifa checking how far along she was…she informed me that she’s ready to give birth…while standing there, i began to feel nauseous…this can’t be happening…I tried to fight it but i had to walk outside to get some fresh air…i couldn’t believe it…i had a fear of hospitals my whole life but i’ve gotten over it but now it seems that i just can’t handle it…my nausea went away so i ventured back in the delivery room…only to have it return a few minutes later…my brain was telling my body to get over it but my stomach kept insisting that i get out of the room…once again i walked out to catch some fresh air…this happened several time until when i returned again the woman was in the middle of pushing her baby out…oh man, my first live birth…my brain finally won over my stomach and allowed me to stay in the room…soon enough i saw the head crowning, there was a bit of hair on his little head…within a few seconds his shoulders, his stomach, then his legs and finally his little feet come out…it was amazing except for all the blood…yikes, it looked painful too…but it was beautiful…